Something Learned

Short one tonight, but you won't mind.

I was thinking about this time I broke up with a woman. I knew the relationship couldn't last anyway, then I caught her two-timing me (in this case, I prefer that term to "cheating"), and I recall the huge fight we had, the names I called her, and all that.

The thing is, for the rest of my life, the single most important thing I think I learned from that relationship was how stupid and pointless it is to get all angry and let fly with the invective during a breakup. Looking back, I'd rather that relationship had never happened, but I'm really glad I learned that particular lesson.

Years later, when I was fired with no justification at all but under the pretext of a bunch of "charges" my paranoid boss thought up, I remained calm despite my anger. I knew nothing would come of losing my cool, and even as my boss was dragging out the entire firing, with a meeting no less, I was thinking about what I'd do next now that I had no job. There was nothing I could say to change his mind, and the fact was that I really wanted out anyway.

So that's what I do--I try to stay calm, bide my time, and see how my emotions ultimately shake themselves out when I've been hurt, discarded, passed over, fired, whatever. It isn't easy, and the turmoil may writhe around in my mind for weeks as I think of all I could have said. But in the end, you have to get over these things sooner or later, so why not start immediately?